So I wouldn’t want to be too gender specific but I think this piece right here, speaks more to the ladies or anyone who has identified as a woman for most of their life. Why I say that is because growing up as little girls and teenagers we were always taught to keep our legs closed. The thing between our thighs, we were told, was a walking ticking time bomb.
If we opened our legs just enough, the entire world would rush in to violate us. Our uncles, our fathers or any male for that matter, could be tempted by that thing. And so we learnt to fear our own vulvas. I mean when last did you take a mirror and just look at it, if you’ve ever for that matter?
I’ve also noticed that sexual education for men and women differs significantly. While boys are encouraged to explore and touch we are taught virtue, virtue and more virtue. And by virtue they aren’t talking about safeguarding our hearts from cruelty, jealousy, hate and bitterness. No. God only cares about our genitals it seems, and he is always waiting around in some corner ready to exact his cruel punishment.
Is it a wonder then that so many women feel like sluts for having sex and feel the need to tailor body counts? I don’t care how much of a liberated bad bitch you think you are. When it’s all said and done, you still feel like whore. You were taught that your worth was dependant on your ‘cleanliness’ and that your body only belonged to your husband.
Boys can play but girls must be wives.
What’s sad about the whole thing is that women are more sexual than men. I mean look at a woman’s body. The lips, curves, butt, eyes, legs. We were created for pleasure, to be pleasing to the eye. Women are beautiful! And you don’t have to pansexual or bisexual or homosexual to find women attractive. Everyone finds women attractive. Even other women!
I mean look at us! Somehow society has managed to convince us that men are the ones who enjoy sexual activity more, which is a lie. Somehow the world flipped it around and made sex something that men want and that real honorable women shy away from. It probably happened round about the time that society became patriarchal and God became a man. Sad times.
Now I know that masturbation as with all things, religion, alcohol and even exercise can be taken to the extremes and so self control and discipline are absolutely necessary. Anything can be taken to the extremes, absolutely anything and everything. People’s lack of self control doesn’t make a thing bad. You can’t be breaking a sweat anytime you find yourself alone. There’s a time and place for these things and by the way, self pleasure shouldn’t focus on the genitals.
Yes.
You heard me.
Self pleasure involves more than touching your vulva or dick. It involves holding yourself, running your hands over your ass, rubbing your thighs and telling yourself how sexy you are. The same way you’d expect a partner to woo and romance you. The problem is society has programmed us into thinking that pleasure has to be given to us whereas pleasure is something you share. After giving it to yourself of course.
I mean why else do you think we still feel insatiable, even with a sexual partner. It’s because there is a void within each of us that can only be satisfied by the attention we give to ourselves. When you learn to give yourself everything you desire from a partner you’ll be a healthier lover generally. Hey! You may even discover that you don’t need a lover afterall. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with happy by yourself.
You don’t have to wait for someone to love you right. Love yourself right! And when someone comes along you can show them how you wanna be loved. Your orgasm is your responsibility and if you can’t give it to yourself, no-one should be expected to shoulder that burden.
I know it’s hard, I know it’s awkward, I know that little voice at the back of your mind may scream at you. But baby the fact that you’re reading this means you’re one foot out of the box.
You are not dirty, vile, unholy or sinful.
Love yourself!
And honey…
Take that mirror and give it a shout out, that’s a gift wrapped present from the Creator Himself right there.
