So I decided to go see one of my mates in Ruwa during the weekend. Since I had no car I had to catch a Kombi (Commuter Omnibus) to town first and then hop in to the Ruwa one at 4th Terminus. Now if you are Zimbabwean you already know what type of a journey I’m talking about. It’s bloody hot, the temperatures are hovering at around 340 C and I’m wearing black denims and a black tee. This sun absorbing outfit is a result of not doing my laundry. Those were the only clothes left. Danngit. I feel like a steak at a barbecue. I’m pissed and it’s not because of the heat. Let me explain.
As soon as I get into the first Kombi in my hood my day plunges into the deep hole of hell. The conductor (hwindi preferably) chose to be held hostage by ZINWA by not paying attention to the balance of nature; he is ignorant at the fact that his underarms emit gases classified globally as biohazards.
I’m sitting right in front of the engine and this guy is in front of me; his arm is stretched through the kombi window as he tries to signal his direction to potential customers. Now from his underarm I see droplets of sweat browned by the dirt collected on its journey down to the nest of hair that is his underarm which is in my face. WTF!? I’m pissed mhen! But it’s really not just the smell that’s bugging me.
Let me explain.
Now I understand that deodorants might have been a luxury before but at the moment there is nothing that one can tell me that stops them from using some. So let’s assume that he can’t not afford one. Even though I am really sure that he does manage to buy his supply of more than $5 dollars every day to keep himself ari mudendere (state of codeine induced highness). Could this guy not spare a dollar and buy some roll on though? That’s pretty basic but, maybe I’m expecting a lot from him, maybe he is really broke. Now if you do drugs and fail to bath there is a problem. But because he can afford drugs he can surely afford soap and toothpaste right. But with the way this brother’s odour is setup, I doubt any of that bathing and tooth brushing business occurred today. Or maybe it’s an everyday thing.
Bloody Hwindis! I’m pissed!
I get into town. Jump out quickly, silently thanking the Lord for speeding up time. My walk to the terminus – 4th is very long and tiring. I arrive at 4th finding a Kombi that needs one person for it to be full. Just my luck! The guy at the door is all smart and I can smell some musky deo on him. Thank the Lord!
As soon as I get in, the guy closes the door from the outside the driver starts the kombi and as he is easing out of the terminus, a kid with unkempt hair and a dungaree hops in. This nigga is wearing a dungaree only and his armpits are emitting a deadly whisper. What? Noooo!
For the life of me! F*ck. Can this day get any better! I’m pissed! I’m very pissed!
Let me explain.
