On a rainy Friday night, I speedily made my way to a dingy bar I had never been to in Harare. I was an hour late, even though I had been secretly counting down to this event all day.
Speed-dating, it sounds rather desperate, doesn’t it?
But then again, how hard could it be to find a companion for some Netflix/Kwese/DStv & Chill in modern day Zimbabwe?
Truth is, it is fucking hard to find love in this city!
Which is why at Zimbabwean Socialite/Artist, Tytan’s inaugural Speed-dating night; I was morbidly relieved I wasn’t the only one!
Nearly 50 adults crammed into a little room that smelt like a heavy dose of hope with a seasoning of anxiety. After every five minutes, we swapped partners and dove into the most cringe-worthily open conversations. From relationship fails to specific tastes and commitment issues that cut deep.
Everyone, men included wanted ‘more’; something that seemed to be missing in what Tytan thinks is an unhealthy Zimbabwean pro-relationship-culture…
“In other countries, people socialize to meet new people and date…the challenge is in Zimbabwe, the concept of dating is different…we think it’s being in love and being in a relationship, actually dating is about getting to know someone…here it easily qualifies as prostitution [laughs]”.
Well, Tytan is far from wrong in this context. I met broken-hearted men who were tired of being taken for poes, defiantly faithful men who were ready to settle down. I also met a couple of chancers, carnivorous characters who were there to prey on the vulnerabilities of women with well-practised charm. After rating from 1 – 4 everything from Chemistry, sense of humour, grooming and manners…
It was both an eye-opening and an emotionally exhausting process.
Do speed-date if you are sick of the bullshit slick-small-talk and are a fairly good judge of character. Also if you miss someone being tongue-tied in your presence for control, sign-up! I wouldn’t recommend speed-dating if you’re easily swayed by a glorious smile and a bit of flirting though.
Oh, I left out the juiciest parts, I have two coffee dates and a drinks date this week, my Instagram will probably announce how that goes (sets account to private)
Till the next one, because yes, I would do it again! (with a shot of tequila or two maybe?)